When Everything Goes Up in Flames

Starting a new chapter after multiple losses

This essay is part of the Between Chapters project, inspired by the book. What chapters are you between? How did you get from one chapter to another? Share your story here.

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What Chapter Are You…

Leaving:

Married mom of two kids that needed me, homeowner, daughter, and sister.

Entering:

Soon to be divorced, empty nester, restarting career, and rebuilding life after grief.

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Five years ago, I found myself in a one-sided marriage with kids who still needed me. I was devoted to my dog, Bella, and happy as a homeowner in the Pacific Palisades. I worked as a personal trainer for women over age fifty, while trying my to make my home a sanctuary for my family. A few times a year, I would go back to New Jersey to visit my family. This always made me feel safe and loved.

Now in 2026, I find myself in a second rental after the loss of my home and all my material possession in the fire. My sweet dog has passed, and my Palisades training clients have scattered. My marriage has dissolved after twenty-five years, and we still have financial matters to navigate. Both kids are now managing young adulthood, their college and career paths.

Photo by Matt Howard on Unsplash

But the losses weren’t confined to the West Coast. Last Christmas, my beloved Irish twin sister, Andie, suffered a brain aneurysm. I flew to Jersey on December 27th. On the 28th, my wonderful dad passed away. I was alone at my sister’s bedside as she took her last breath on New Year’s Eve. My Jersey family went from five to three family members in three short days.

In my short-term condo rental in the Highlands, there has been one problem after another. It’s almost comical. After what I have been through, I take it in stride. It’s time to sort out the financial realities and see where I will land. My 87-year-old mom needs me in Jersey, and I have estate planning to finish for my sister.

It’s a lot.

I am turning sixty-two this month, the age when I can take my Social Security checks and sail off into the sunset. I have left the cozy comfort of a life that I knew and what I thought my future would be. I am choosing to love and care for my mother and children while I still can, while also honoring my own need for self-care.

I have learned that we can exit this world unexpectedly, and that there is a finite amount of time to, say, take that trip, take that chance, or become the person you always wanted to be. Fear and ego have lessened their hold on me as I embrace being present and let go of worry.

Photo by Faye Saravani on Unsplash

I have found that music, friends, exercise, and quiet time in nature helped carry me through. The Universe blessed me with many synchronicities which will bring me comfort for whatever comes next.

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Jamie Gallo is the author of Inner Visions for the Outer You. Follow her on Instagram @jamiemgallo.