I’m so sorry Zibby for this sudden loss. As a literary person you may be able to accept this as a comfort. I just finished My Friends by Fredrik Backman. The characters have all suffered the loss of loved ones and when the younger character questions how to deal with these deaths, these losses, the response feels so comforting to me. Their loved ones’ presence is often tangibly felt. A glimpse of him rounding a corner. Seeing him in a favorite sweater. Perhaps her scent in a cafe. The survivor labels that as them saying “peek-a-boo”, sending messages from Heaven. It may sound trite or even ridiculous, but if it allows you some sort of peace, who cares? Again, my condolences to you and your mom, your kids…
And the hostages will return. And life throws us everything without perfect timing. 💙❤️
So so sorry. You describe your feelings so beautifully. We usually say “no words”, yet you are able to write about the depth of your pain and your experience beautifully.
Your stepdad has a similar look to my dad who I lost 12 years ago.
Your pain is exactly what I went thru
My advice: cancel the pop up
Be there with family
You’ll never get this time back where you’ll sit snd reminisce which is very therapeutic.
Your (step)dad was an important person in your life and please take the time to grieve, keep writing, share his stories, laugh, cry, go thru photos, etc.
Hug, and then cry again! Our prayers are with you and your mom and your family!
Crying along with you from an RV in a field in Kansas, surrounded by dogs and horses. Losses like these feel impossible. He was clearly one of a kind — as was your love for him. Thank God he didn’t suffer. I once heard that people with the best karma go fast. I don’t know if that’s true, but it feels right here. xo 🙏
Such a powerful, honest and loving tribute, as only you Zibby can uniquely share w the world. May your step-father’s memory be for a blessing and his life a continuing inspiration to all who knew and loved him.
This hits hard for me too - I so relate and feel your pain ! - I adored my stepdad and I miss him so much - i see him mouth the words “ I love you “ , which he often did . My mom died suddenly just like your Howard , a shock I’ll never recover from , and my poor stepdad Hal had Alzheimer’s and a terrible confusing year before he joined her .
I guess we are lucky to have had them
as long as we did . And going fast like that is a blessing , no suffering . I’m glad you can express your pain and emotions . Sending condolences and may his memory be a blessing .
Sorry for your loss. May Howard's memory always be for a blessing.
Stacy Waldman Bass's debut memoir, "Lightkeeper," deals with grief & memory. Her father died suddenly (& tragically), & Stacy writes beautifully about loss & focuses about looking at photos as a way to keep someone's light shining
I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my mom 11 months ago and things I'm doing that we used to do together still make me feel her loss. Your stepdad looks like such a nice man.
Sorry for your shocking loss. From your well-written descriptions, Howard sounded like a good family man. When good people are gone, it's a great loss for everyone, regardless of our genetic and demographic ties.
Deepest condolences on your loss. May the love and support of your family and friends and your faith help ease you through this difficult period.May the memories of the happy and loving times bring comfort and consolation to your heart.❤️
As I sit here reading this, I can’t help but think of my wonderful stepfather myself. My parents are both 90 and I have just moved them here from Palm Desert to Playa Vista in a living facility. It’s beautiful there, but I can’t help but think what will happen if either one of them end up alone .I feel so for you. Sending so much love to you and your family and mostly to your mother.
I’m so sorry Zibby for this sudden loss. As a literary person you may be able to accept this as a comfort. I just finished My Friends by Fredrik Backman. The characters have all suffered the loss of loved ones and when the younger character questions how to deal with these deaths, these losses, the response feels so comforting to me. Their loved ones’ presence is often tangibly felt. A glimpse of him rounding a corner. Seeing him in a favorite sweater. Perhaps her scent in a cafe. The survivor labels that as them saying “peek-a-boo”, sending messages from Heaven. It may sound trite or even ridiculous, but if it allows you some sort of peace, who cares? Again, my condolences to you and your mom, your kids…
And the hostages will return. And life throws us everything without perfect timing. 💙❤️
I am so sorry for your loss. Sending a big hug to you, your mom and whole family 🤍
So so sorry. You describe your feelings so beautifully. We usually say “no words”, yet you are able to write about the depth of your pain and your experience beautifully.
Your stepdad has a similar look to my dad who I lost 12 years ago.
Your pain is exactly what I went thru
My advice: cancel the pop up
Be there with family
You’ll never get this time back where you’ll sit snd reminisce which is very therapeutic.
Your (step)dad was an important person in your life and please take the time to grieve, keep writing, share his stories, laugh, cry, go thru photos, etc.
Hug, and then cry again! Our prayers are with you and your mom and your family!
How well you capture pain and love in the same breath. Keep taking deep breaths, Zibby.
So sorry for the pain each of you is enduring, and the great loss you are each feeling.
May your dear stepdad's memory be for a blessing.
Wishing your family comfort at this difficult time.
Oh, Zibby. My heart breaks for you and your family. This is a beautiful tribute to Howard and the power of love.
My stepmom was amazing...Canadian and not Jewish
Crying along with you from an RV in a field in Kansas, surrounded by dogs and horses. Losses like these feel impossible. He was clearly one of a kind — as was your love for him. Thank God he didn’t suffer. I once heard that people with the best karma go fast. I don’t know if that’s true, but it feels right here. xo 🙏
Such a powerful, honest and loving tribute, as only you Zibby can uniquely share w the world. May your step-father’s memory be for a blessing and his life a continuing inspiration to all who knew and loved him.
Am Yisroel Chai:
we mourn and rejoice, so often at the same time.
This hits hard for me too - I so relate and feel your pain ! - I adored my stepdad and I miss him so much - i see him mouth the words “ I love you “ , which he often did . My mom died suddenly just like your Howard , a shock I’ll never recover from , and my poor stepdad Hal had Alzheimer’s and a terrible confusing year before he joined her .
I guess we are lucky to have had them
as long as we did . And going fast like that is a blessing , no suffering . I’m glad you can express your pain and emotions . Sending condolences and may his memory be a blessing .
Sorry for your loss. May Howard's memory always be for a blessing.
Stacy Waldman Bass's debut memoir, "Lightkeeper," deals with grief & memory. Her father died suddenly (& tragically), & Stacy writes beautifully about loss & focuses about looking at photos as a way to keep someone's light shining
I'm sorry for your loss. I lost my mom 11 months ago and things I'm doing that we used to do together still make me feel her loss. Your stepdad looks like such a nice man.
I'm so sorry for your loss.
Sorry for your shocking loss. From your well-written descriptions, Howard sounded like a good family man. When good people are gone, it's a great loss for everyone, regardless of our genetic and demographic ties.
Deepest condolences on your loss. May the love and support of your family and friends and your faith help ease you through this difficult period.May the memories of the happy and loving times bring comfort and consolation to your heart.❤️
As I sit here reading this, I can’t help but think of my wonderful stepfather myself. My parents are both 90 and I have just moved them here from Palm Desert to Playa Vista in a living facility. It’s beautiful there, but I can’t help but think what will happen if either one of them end up alone .I feel so for you. Sending so much love to you and your family and mostly to your mother.