This essay is part of the Between Chapters project, inspired by the book. What chapters are you between? How did you get from one chapter to another? Share your story here.
I’ve charted a path I never could have imagined. It’s non-linear and often disconnected. How did this happen? By continually stepping up to the plate to become the woman I want to be.
I’ve had different goals at different times: building a world class ballpark and baseball organization, learning and evolving, empowering women, acclimating to life after being a high-powered sports executive, starting my own business, leading a women’s fashion company, and being a good wife and mother. There are, however, several common threads that connect my journey: following my passion, making difficult choices, and taking risks.
For me, big change happened at age forty-five. After a fifteen-year career with the Milwaukee Brewers that began as General Counsel, then President & CEO and finally Chairman of the Board, we moved to Arizona (not a change this Midwest-East Coast girl would have embarked on if her husband’s career had not brought us there). Not only was I in a city where I had no roots, I was starting my own business with a women’s fashion company (Worth New York), which couldn’t have been more different from my baseball career and my legal background.
While I wouldn’t trade a day of my life with the Brewers, I found myself at a place where my priority was to be more family-focused. I chose this business because it afforded me the flexibility to be the wife, mother, daughter, and friend I wanted to be while also having the opportunity to succeed in business.
I was more than a little anxious as I stepped into this next chapter. The typical woman of Worth was well connected and a woman of influence in her community. Not only was I not this, I was doing something I had no training for, in a place where I knew no one.
I questioned whether I was making the right pivot. You know doubt—that really nasty voice inside your head questioning you and warning you of all the things that might go wrong. I call that voice “my nasty roommate.” She can be nastier than the meanest of Twitter wars. My doubts were exasperated by friends and colleagues who didn’t understand why I would transition away from something I truly loved to something that lacked the glamour and prestige of my baseball life.
The rewards of putting myself through times of self-doubt were huge. Clients became friends, I built my business into one of the largest in the country, and my family life flourished. Ultimately, I was recruited to become president of the company. The happiest part of this story is the knowledge and confidence I gained with the reinvention of myself in pursuit of my definition of personal success. It made my next pivot a little less daunting as I reminded myself that doubt kills more dreams than failure does.
After eleven great years in Arizona, we became empty nesters and moved to New York. I took a “gap year” to give myself time and space to figure out what I wanted my next chapter to be. I’m a big believer in taking small steps to test new ideas and opportunities. My experience transitioning from a Baseball executive and Midwest-East Coast girl gave me the confidence to believe the reward of stepping away from a career and place I loved were risks worth taking.
There were more than a few uncomfortable moments. One of the questions I grew to hate was when someone asked what I did. For the first time in my life, I didn’t have a title. While I was serving as a strategic advisor, mentoring and writing, I needed an answer to this question so I gave myself a title: “Serial Reinventor.”
Part of my DNA is finding the opportunity in challenges and thriving when I’m learning and growing. I’m always interested in learning other people’s stories. So I ended up starting a passion project a few years ago with the intent to create a keepsake for my family which entailed answering about 100 questions. This Playbook captures the author’s beliefs, passions, experiences, successes, challenges, and more. No one’s life is a highlight reel. A life is made up of many experiences, thoughts and details. As is often the case, one thing leads to another.
After completing the Playbook, I formed My Playbook Collectives where a small group completes the Playbook together. We meet and share our answers with each other. The result is not only a cherished keepsake, but lifelong friendships for the participants.
In an age where we’re all striving for more authentic and deeper interactions, there is no better way to achieve this than to share your stories and experiences. Maria Shriver, who I greatly admire, recently wrote about how she was feeling lonely and that her world was shrinking. I was stunned to learn that Maria, who is still doing great things, was lonely. You never know what someone else is feeling. It’s easy to see the glamour and success in others’ lives but not always the pain and challenges. I’ve learned that no matter who you are and what you have or don’t have, what brings you happiness and meets your definition of success will change as you age, and more importantly, as your opportunities and priorities change.
Most of us would rather embrace the status quo. But change happens. Sometimes we like it; often we don’t. Sometimes we get to initiate it; often we don’t. Either way, it’s hard because growth and comfort do not coexist. And I love that Between Chapters is supporting and inspiring others to do so.
Today, I’m a mom, wife, businesswoman, board member, advocate for women and families, mentor, friend, and baseball fan (order depends on the day!).
I don’t know how “my story” will end, but I do know I’ll never stop evolving and learning.
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